Silence

I have had the verse, "Be still, and know that I am God." continuously going through my head. I think God is trying to tell me something. After having health problems since last fall and trying to figure things out, I think I am beginning to understand what path I am supposed to be following right now.

I honestly felt like I was supposed to leave my job but I was spending so much time thinking about finances and I really liked my job. So I stayed until my legs wouldn't hold me anymore (literally). I went on sick leave for three months, and still didn't have any answers and still was not feeling well. So I quit. It has been a difficult summer financially, but I feel really good about what I am doing. I have been able to spend the summer with my girls. It would break my heart when I would be leaving for work and see tears rolling down their faces and have them asking me why I don't want to stay with them. I am also helping my husband organize his business. Which is something that was desperately needed. Sorry dear.

And something that is really exciting is that I am writing Leader's notes to accompany my book so that anyone leading "What Makes You Unique?" as a small group will have something to follow and to give them additional ideas. It has been really great to spend more time with my book. I talked with my publisher and what we are going to do is offer the notes from my website for free but ask for an evaluation from the groups that are using them so that I can keep working on them and eventually turn it into an accompanying book. I am just amazed by all that is happening with my book. I thought winning a National award was going to be a highlight but I have to say that hearing from groups that are studying my book has been so rewarding.

My girls will be starting school in a couple of weeks, it is going to be odd not having anyone at home. But I will enjoy the silence and practise it. I have just been recently diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Which means I have to take it easy, I am now in a place where I have to be obedient, life has kept me too busy for the past few years. Now it is time for me to take charge of my life and slow it down and listen to what God is telling me. He is God and I am not. If I want to be effective in my ministry I can't be running around like a crazy person. What is that going to prove? My husband, my girls and my relationship with Christ are my priorities, nothing else needs to fill up my time and drain my energy. It feels good to be silent and know God.